
The 2014 International Professional Hide-and-Seek Championships have finally concluded after 12 long years. Julian “The Drapery” Drip was found in a Barrie maintenance closet by a confused janitor, officially securing his title as the…

In a historic win for “redundant justice,” Arthur Glower of Courtice has successfully sued his own shadow for loitering, harassment, and “maliciously looming” during the golden hour. The court has now issued a restraining…

Scarborough man William Thistle has officially cut his grocery bill to zero by teaching himself how to photosynthesize. While his wife is tired of re-potting him and his skin is turning a suspicious shade…

Bill Goward of Oshawa found a revolutionary way to slow down local speeders: the crushing weight of a mother’s disappointment. Discover how a simple cardboard cutout achieved what years of law enforcement and heavy…

President Ronald Plump has requested a modest $1 billion for a “security overhaul” featuring a high-tech Tactical Ballroom for rhythmic diplomacy and a moat filled with laser-equipped sharks. Because nothing says national security like…

Move over, HIIT. A new study suggests that “vocal shredding”—the act of screaming into a paper bag—burns more calories than a four-minute mile by engaging in maximal diaphragmatic spasming.

A multi-agency task force raided “Bernie’s Artisanal Brine & Provisions” in Manhattan, uncovering a subterranean bunker filled with gambling machines disguised as pastrami steamers and betting chips made of flavored potato slices.

A reported sighting of a 60-foot prehistoric shark near Nanaimo has triggered bureaucratic concern, marine speculation, and deeply Canadian attempts to remain calm in the presence of a predator the size of a commuter…

: A localized crisis is unfolding in Victoria Park after a single, left-footed blue sneaker was discovered meticulously placed on a park bench. With no owner in sight and the right-footed counterpart missing, local…

The 2014 International Professional Hide-and-Seek Championships have finally concluded after 12 long years. Julian “The Drapery” Drip was found in a Barrie maintenance closet by a confused janitor, officially securing his title as the…

In a historic win for “redundant justice,” Arthur Glower of Courtice has successfully sued his own shadow for loitering, harassment, and “maliciously looming” during the golden hour. The court has now issued a restraining…

Scarborough man William Thistle has officially cut his grocery bill to zero by teaching himself how to photosynthesize. While his wife is tired of re-potting him and his skin is turning a suspicious shade…

Bill Goward of Oshawa found a revolutionary way to slow down local speeders: the crushing weight of a mother’s disappointment. Discover how a simple cardboard cutout achieved what years of law enforcement and heavy…

President Ronald Plump has requested a modest $1 billion for a “security overhaul” featuring a high-tech Tactical Ballroom for rhythmic diplomacy and a moat filled with laser-equipped sharks. Because nothing says national security like…

Move over, HIIT. A new study suggests that “vocal shredding”—the act of screaming into a paper bag—burns more calories than a four-minute mile by engaging in maximal diaphragmatic spasming.

A multi-agency task force raided “Bernie’s Artisanal Brine & Provisions” in Manhattan, uncovering a subterranean bunker filled with gambling machines disguised as pastrami steamers and betting chips made of flavored potato slices.

A reported sighting of a 60-foot prehistoric shark near Nanaimo has triggered bureaucratic concern, marine speculation, and deeply Canadian attempts to remain calm in the presence of a predator the size of a commuter…

: A localized crisis is unfolding in Victoria Park after a single, left-footed blue sneaker was discovered meticulously placed on a park bench. With no owner in sight and the right-footed counterpart missing, local…
You must be logged in to post a comment.